Me and my instrument: a journey.
It’s nothing new: there is something really special when people gather - in person - and go on a journey together. A journey of connecting, allowing openings to happen, allowing each other to be seen in their grief and in their joy. Allowing themselves to be seen by the others - and by themselves.
There’s something so particular that always happens, when I (we) work with musicians. And I can feel it to the bones, because I’ve been in that classical music world long enough (for 20 years) and even though I „only“ studied music for becoming a teacher, I had all the stress and pain and psychological twists in my head and body that one can have. And with that: also the excuses for the pain and the pressure („that’s just how it has to be if I want to play well“). And then there is the fact that in that world it’s not so easy to come across alternative ways of being with the pressure and pain, leave alone daring to dream another way of music making and imagining a more human, benevolent (and non hirarchical non patronizing and non abusive) way of being accommpanied and taught on this multifaceted path of being a musician. (I was lucky to stumble across the Alexander Technique with 20, which saved me in many ways). But let me share what’s also possible:
So … what happens, when music makers come together - people who are feeling drawn to a workshop with us - even without exactly knowing what to expect?
Well in the recent workshop „Me and my instrument: a journey“ - what happened was: a lot of tears. A lot a lot of tears. Grief and relief. To share maybe for the first time in a safe space about the struggles and often this weird disconnect and contradiction between: My heart has actually a deep conection with the music making - and on the other hand there is this high performance pressure mode, which overshadows the essence of why I’m making music in the first place.
Very common … and felt in the body - when we give space to that. So many themes I could share now. But let’s leave it here. I just want to share how deeply I see (and feel) how needed - and possible this work ist. To soften, to reconnect, to go beyond competition, to see the human being who is playing, to listen as a human being to a human being and not as a highly skilled professional to another machine who might play a wrong note … yes. There’s work to do. And it’s so beautiful.
So beautiful what happens in these workshops and retreats. Such an honor to accompany humans - and to go beyond their „function“ as musician. Ah - such relief that happens in these circles. And from my perspective: such big work for the collective that people do there. Since the twisted and rigid musical world - at the end is also just a symptom of our twisted society.
So … what happens, when people, music makers connect and go beyond competition? When they sink back into their bodies, find a safe space within themselves, start dancing with and without their instruments again, when they are being truly seen mirrored and validated in their exhaustion? Well … what I’m witnissing is: realness, rawness, vulnerable direct deep connection, support, beauty and love.
May the taste of this needed medicine for our times have sweet and strong ripples into the world. Thank you for reading and feeling. With love, Susanne
